Sunday, 23 June 2013

Singapore: The Night Safari's tram commentary

A more northerly wind kept the smog at low levels allowing an excursion to the Night Safari to proceed as planned. An added bonus was the relatively low traffic on the roads and less sweaty people at the zoo. Although we walked through most of the grounds to get a better view of the animals, it is always worth taking the tram for the wonderful commentary aimed at the lowest common denominator:
‘......and those are the Greater Flamingos, they enjoy being in a crowd [you don't say]. Greater Flamingos are [indiscernible] swimmers, but really thrive on......[what did she say?]......where they [something] and breed and eat......[completely indiscernible]......but stir up the bottom......to get......their food [audible laughter from Chris]......

......[gibberish]......in the water where......[indiscernible]......territories......[nope, didn't get that either]......and occasional fighting......[OK, I give up]......sadly, they’re listed as vulnerable to extinction because of their......[what language is this?]......destruction.
 
......and on the ground to your right, those are the Barasingha [note: I only worked out this word  because I looked it up on the map afterwards]......the most striking feature is its......[no idea]......they use smell as their primary sense for detecting danger......[something incomprehensible]......not only their food, it also provides as security for their foals......[no idea]......also known as the Manchurian......[something or other]......secret of long life, vitality and good luck......
 
......[incomprehensible, but probably talking about hippos]......in Asia......social animals, but they do like......to share their food......with one another......they usually eat around......[I guess there should be a number here]......calories......or at times feed on fallen fruits, insects and even vegetables. They have powerful jaws with teeth [did she say 'beside'?] to crush bones and fries [think that’s what she said]......that......[right, I’m bored] around a thousand pounds......and when they are walking......this is because their hind legs are  shorter than......their......hind......legs [aha, we’re talking about hyenas now].

 ......The eternal enemies of the hyenas, well those are......the mighty lions. Just like the movie ‘The Lion King’, the name Simba means lion in Swahili......
[I'm losing the will to live] as a symbol of power......courage......[throw me to one of the bloody lions]......and national flags in many civilisations......'

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